Last week we wrote down the crap that boomerangs in our heads.
We here at the Committed Impulse Laboratory for Presence Productivity and Creativity (CILPPC) have tallied the results.
The scientists are slightly baffled.
What is the truth about all these people with BHC (Boomeranging Head Crap)?
Is all the BHC accurate?
We see that there are two possibilities regarding these people that sling BHC between their ears.
Please help us figure out which possibility is most accurate.
Just to keep a sense of order, and status quo, let’s begin with the first possibility first.
Please examine the following.
By an odd and miraculous freak of statistics all the people who commented on last weeks blog post are FOFS. The chances of this are one in a zillion katrillion, however we at The CI Lab strive to keep an open mind to all possibilities.
What’s an FOFS?
You don’t know what an FOFS is?
FOFS is an acronym for…
Fat Old Failure, Stupid.
Some characteristics of a typical FOFS:
Don’t deserve anything good.
are way too old (And before they were way too old they were way too young.)
can’t save money.
F is for failure.
have no original content.
will never find the one.
know S is not for Success it’s for being Sucky.
are doomed to a life of mediocrity.
will never make it.
will always be alone.
should be further along by now in their career.
and are pretty much plain ol’ stupid.
Oh and, FOFS’ have terrible bodies.
Why? Because they:
are old and fat.
are ugly and fat.
are fat fat fat.
have pores that are too small.
have teeth that aren’t white enough.
should go tanning, but won’t.
have really bad hair.
have never had the body they want.
are too skinny and ugly to be a leading man and too tall to be a funny sidekick.
Oh, and just so we’re clear FOFS will never travel and others always have it better than them.
All readers take a breath pleeeease. (inhale and exhale required)
None of that mental chatter is accurate.
Take a look.
When your mind starts spinning around, it’s basically the same crap as everyone else.
What does this mean?
An idle mind is the devil’s playground? I don’t know about no devil – but I know when I sit back and listen to my crapper – it always sucks.
I’m of course not referring to brilliant insights, or those ideas that help us see the world more beautifully, those great business ideas, the new story or script idea, the new way to play a character or those ideas that bring fortune or just food and water to those most in need.
What I’m referring to is that clammer of self reproach that EVERYONE has when they listen to their BHC.
YOU ARE NOT SPECIAL. YOUR CRAPPY THOUGHTS ARE THE SAME AS EVERYONE ELSE’S.
It’s the matrix of suckiness. It’s an illusion.
Listen up, people.
We all have the same crap. It’s not significant or accurate. It’s just crap.
Here’s the advice section:
Don’t waste a moment of your life trying to improve your crap.
Hey, if you found a pile of dog shit on the street would you really waste time trying to improve it. Would you go put a lovely bow on it and pray for it to change? Would you surround it with pink light and try to make it float into the heavens?
You’d either clean it up and chuck it (especially if it’s your dog.), or if you live in the woods – you’d let the rain wash it away.
Go chop some wood, write a story, make love, create, get to work and have fun.
This is a temporary party – the world needs you now.
Listening to the BHC, trying to improve the BHC, is waste management.
So, the next time your mind starts abusing you let it be a reminder that you’ve left the truth and strolled down dog shit alley.
Turn around before you ruin your shoes.
So, here’s what I want you to do:
Write down two things below that you will accomplish this week. As you go about doing them, yes, the BHC will start. So what! You are going to re-engage with the task and not get lost in the Matrix of suckiness. Agreed?
Write below, the two things you will accomplish this week.