Last week we wrote down the crap that boomerangs in our heads.
We here at the Committed Impulse Laboratory for Presence Productivity and Creativity (CILPPC) have tallied the results.
The scientists are slightly baffled.
What is the truth about all these people with BHC (Boomeranging Head Crap)?
Is all the BHC accurate?
We see that there are two possibilities regarding these people that sling BHC between their ears.
Please help us figure out which possibility is most accurate.
Just to keep a sense of order, and status quo, let’s begin with the first possibility first.
Please examine the following.
POSSIBILITY ONE…
By an odd and miraculous freak of statistics all the people who commented on last weeks blog post are FOFS. The chances of this are one in a zillion katrillion, however we at The CI Lab strive to keep an open mind to all possibilities.
What?
What’s an FOFS?
You don’t know what an FOFS is?
FOFS is an acronym for…
Fat Old Failure, Stupid.
Some characteristics of a typical FOFS:
They:
Don’t deserve anything good.
are way too old (And before they were way too old they were way too young.)
lack Confidence.
can’t save money.
F is for failure.
have no original content.
will never find the one.
know S is not for Success it’s for being Sucky.
are doomed to a life of mediocrity.
will never make it.
will always be alone.
should be further along by now in their career.
and are pretty much plain ol’ stupid.
Oh and, FOFS’ have terrible bodies.
Why? Because they:
are old and fat.
are ugly and fat.
are fat fat fat.
have pores that are too small.
have teeth that aren’t white enough.
should go tanning, but won’t.
have really bad hair.
have never had the body they want.
are too skinny and ugly to be a leading man and too tall to be a funny sidekick.
Oh, and just so we’re clear FOFS will never travel and others always have it better than them.
All readers take a breath pleeeease. (inhale and exhale required)
OR
POSSIBILITY TWO…
None of that mental chatter is accurate.
Take a look.
When your mind starts spinning around, it’s basically the same crap as everyone else.
What does this mean?
An idle mind is the devil’s playground? I don’t know about no devil – but I know when I sit back and listen to my crapper – it always sucks.
I’m of course not referring to brilliant insights, or those ideas that help us see the world more beautifully, those great business ideas, the new story or script idea, the new way to play a character or those ideas that bring fortune or just food and water to those most in need.
No
What I’m referring to is that clammer of self reproach that EVERYONE has when they listen to their BHC.
YOU ARE NOT SPECIAL. YOUR CRAPPY THOUGHTS ARE THE SAME AS EVERYONE ELSE’S.
It’s the matrix of suckiness. It’s an illusion.
Hello!!!
Listen up, people.
We all have the same crap. It’s not significant or accurate. It’s just crap.
Here’s the advice section:
Don’t waste a moment of your life trying to improve your crap.
Hey, if you found a pile of dog shit on the street would you really waste time trying to improve it. Would you go put a lovely bow on it and pray for it to change? Would you surround it with pink light and try to make it float into the heavens?
NO!
You’d either clean it up and chuck it (especially if it’s your dog.), or if you live in the woods – you’d let the rain wash it away.
Go chop some wood, write a story, make love, create, get to work and have fun.
This is a temporary party – the world needs you now.
Listening to the BHC, trying to improve the BHC, is waste management.
So, the next time your mind starts abusing you let it be a reminder that you’ve left the truth and strolled down dog shit alley.
Turn around before you ruin your shoes.
So, here’s what I want you to do:
Write down two things below that you will accomplish this week. As you go about doing them, yes, the BHC will start. So what! You are going to re-engage with the task and not get lost in the Matrix of suckiness. Agreed?
Start now.
Write below, the two things you will accomplish this week.
Big Hug
Josh Pais
Love this post!
This week I will
1) Book my first client
2) Write a bitchin’ blog post/newsletter.
And that is all.
🙂
.-= Natalie´s last blog ..Bust a Move =-.
Love this post! The analogy of “would you put a pink bow on your pile of crap”
1.Elevate three scenes in my screenplay rather than spend the whole week telling myself how crappy they are.
2.Find a way to be sexy every day instead of pointing out all week why I think I’m not.
Thanks Josh
This post really put perspective into my life.
1. Continue writing my screenplay
2. Smile
Great to hear from scientists!
I wanted to thank you because my increased commitment to my impulses in the audition room just booked me the most important job of my career so far, and I couldn’t be happier…except for the fact that I haven’t told anybody yet because I’m afraid that if I do it’ll all disappear and I’ll be broken. I was anxious after the callbacks for 2 weeks and started creating reasons for why I wouldn’t get the job. Every time I’d start slipping into the ‘because you suck’ mantra, i’d call my self back and my life was full again. so thank you Josh, and thank you world.
1. Announce my good news
2. send my love to all!
Perri
I really really love this. Cannot tell you enough how much I love it! And something that hit me in reading about the “too old” rant is that I used to get caught in the “I’m too young to get the roles I really want, or be taken seriously.” And now that I’m finally in the older category, the “too fat” syndrome is rallying around. And it makes me think of something you said in CI class last night: “There’s nothing WRONG with us.” And it’s just a matter to letting go of the BS and being HERE. I’m BACK!!!
Thank you, Josh.
My goals this week are:
1) to HAVE FUN!!!!!
2) to let love light the way
Eeeehhaaaa
i will go out to a party this week
and i will learn a monolog
have a lovely week everybody
thanks
ziggie
Lolz, I love it. We all deal with the same bullshit (in a general sorta way) 😛
1) Finish unpacking and organize my new appt.
2) Get started on my MMA course and finish it.
🙂
I will go to a holiday party (tonight in fact) and be way way way more flirtatious and fun than i have ever been before in my life!
I will submit my headshot and resume to three audition opportunities!
THIS WEEK!
Fabulous post. Such a relief to know that everyone else is just as crazy as I am 🙂
2 things I’m going to accomplish this week:
1. Finish the content for my new website
2. Lease a new car for my road trip!
Thanks Josh!
xo
Yea
We all seem to be in this together!
Brilliant post!! Thank you for the boost of inspiration!!
For this week I will accomplish:
1. Writing an awesome, insightful blog post
2. Meeting-up with my new writer’s collective
🙂
Thanks Josh, had an awesome laugh. So simple and so true. This week I will (1) finish my VO and narrative for Bordeaux and (2) start editing the Wyoming trip.
I was waiting in anticipation for the tally!
Thanks Josh,
I will send a proposal for something big and know that I can totally rock it out -when- it is accepted and I will make a commitment to do something that is just for me tomorrow when I sign up for a very special e-course.
.-= Hannah Marcotti´s last blog ..Eli Ate It =-.
HA! I love this post. LOVE IT!
There was a time when I looked in the mirror my reflection said “You Suck!”. I did the hokey pokey and turned myself around. Now I teach others to do the same. AND I wrote a book about it! “You Suck! (Have You Ever Said That To Yourself?): How to Turn Your Lying Fraidy-Cat Inner Critic Into a Confident Courageous Fan”
Thanks, Josh, for helping others do the same.
.-= Valery Satterwhite´s last blog ..Holiday Funk 7 Steps to Rise Above =-.
I will
1)keep editing my screenplay
2)do some Yoga
For extra credit) put up a Christmas tree.
Interesting, I had four auditions this week and I hosted an event with the fashion designer Cynthia Rowley, pretty rad right? But all my mind wanted to talk to me about today was how I “may have totally BLOWN ONE of my auditions”. I had to do everything in my power to wrestle that silly mind to the ground!
Whew, glad it wasn’t just me.
I will do some Christmas decorating and rock a hat sale tomorrow!
Thanks for bringing the cold eye of science to our BHC. Good stuff!
.-= chicsinger simone´s last blog ..Bridal foof FTW =-.
I love this blog! I think I am going to chill here for a little while instead of in my head 🙂
1. change my website so that it reflects me, and not wiggle out of it this time
2. Organize my environment and chuck all the excess crap to make room for great things to come in my life.
.-= Pat´s last blog ..Rich-Happy & Hot Ladies take over NYC =-.
Love this post! Thanks for kicking my mind’s ass.
1. Write the table of contents for my book on self esteem + confidence.
2. Take care of my interview questions for Co-creator radio.
3. Promote + Fill my event on Dec 18th:
http://livingwellnesslive.eventbrite.com/
Love this post 🙂
1 ~ write a kick ass blog post
2 ~ fix the product page on my website
Thanks a bunch!
Rachel
I will:
1)Read at least 3 plays.
2)Make one more new friend.
I had such a laugh! Thank you so much for helping me see my lack of originality in BHC 😀
It’s really amazing how this harassing “monster” – the nagging mind – looks now like a ridiculous rat race.
This week I’ll:
1. send a Christmas mailing to our CDs
2. finish the notes for my business plan
Very much love and see you soon!
Llyane
Love your mail, Josh! One day I will be able to have my newly graduated with honors in theatre arts son take CI classes.
As for me,
1. Apply, even though I can’t do it, JUST FOR ME I will apply to the Secret Sauce Society. Gotta stay connected.
2. Spend an hour every day finding my desk. Really.
This blog post came right in time; I booked a short film and for the last 24 hours I’ve been in my head.
Thank you!
I will learn my lines with enthusiasm and I will be thankful that I have a job that supports me while I persue my passion.
Thank you again.
You saved me today Mr. Pais!
I had the worst audition of my life.
BHC silenced before, but raging post.
FOFS loud and clear; screaming in my face all day and night.
Now at 1:30 am I open up my email and all becomes clear.
Ahhhhh.
Of course.
I’M BACK
Next time I will turn around before I ruin my shoes (and will open my email earlier!)
Thank you so much. See you in a month in LA.
This week I will:1. focus on living in the moment
2. Let the people I love know how much they mean to me (and stop wasting precious time being distracted by nonsense!)
Love it, perfect timing, I was putting together a bow and adding xmas ornaments to my shit.
1. I will catch up on my coaching class
2. I will work out 3 times this week
love you Josh!
I will kill my shrink and then apply fir disability…
Awesome post! This week I will:
1. Get help choosing my headshot from new pics
2. Spend at least 5 minutes everyday for quiet, alone time
this week I will….
draw lines on my yoga mat so I can practice yoga for scoliosis at home
make a fun work out mix
continue developing this short film (and shoot it on Saturday)
turn 25!
You made me think, giggle and contemplate dog shit…all in one blog post. DAMN YOU’RE GOOD!!! 😉
This week I plan to:
~Catch up on all the work/emails that have been piling up since I was away for 2 weeks
~Finally get back to doing Ms. LaPorte’s FireStarter Sessions, which I’d put on hiatus for the last month.
I best get crackin’…
Thanks for rockin’ it Josh!
hey ! love the post
1- ill get the agreement to continue my studies !
2- ill get the best marks on my examz!
1) Send that thank you CD to the PD who I had a meeting with last week;
2) Talk to 7 random women at the club tonight.